The Real Monster Raving Loony Party

In these dark and gloomy days of Britain’s descent into a nightmare of ramshackle government, there are few reasons to smile and even fewer to break into guffaws. Luckily, the celebrated stand-up comedian Jeremy Corbyn and his associates are well advanced with their plans to bring back humour into British life and have clearly been inspired by the celebrated movie Life of Brian and especially the Peoples Front of Judaea/Judaean Peoples Front scene at the amphitheatre.

Judith Woods spent a mad 24 hours at the Your Party comedy festival conference in Liverpool for the Telegraph:

Later today [Sunday, 30 November] Britain’s frayed alliance of disillusioned socialists will formally be named, having already been shamed at this, its first party car-crash – sorry, conference – in Liverpool. Truly, in the past 48 hours Your Party has been riven with such division it’s hard to know how in Marx’s name it’s still standing.

In the Left corner, old timer Jeremy “collectivist allotments” Corbyn promising unity and hope and all the other really great socialist stuff his previous party never got around to providing.

In the far-Left corner, firebrand Zarah “trans women are women” Sultana in quite the temper, castigating her own party as toxic and accusing it of carrying out a witch hunt against Faithfuls who also happen to be in the Socialist Workers Party.

On Saturday the Coventry South MP became so self-righteously aerated she boycotted her own conference. How’s that for sticking it to the patriarchy?

Uh-oh. Rookie mistake. In her absence, the ruddy members only went and voted to block both Corbyn and her from leading the party in favour of – ta-dah – collective leadership by members. Now that really was left field.

I’m no policy analyst, but I’ve read Animal Farm, comrade, and it doesn’t take a Cassandra to predict this won’t end well.

The ‘Party’ so far has struggled to agree on anything, even policies:

In just three short months, Your Party has struggled with internal divisions over leadership, membership control, funding and direction. At one point it bore the unhappy distinction of being a party with six MPs and four factions. By current standards that would make it pretty much a shoo-in for government, except there aren’t enough bedrooms in No 10 to accommodate a committee.

Plus, Your Party hasn’t got any actual policies yet. Just an awful lot of opinions, as attested by the hodgepodge of impassioned speakers addressing conference in between the hecklers.

All is not lost though. On Sunday the Guardian announced that Your Party had made a decision about how it will be led:

The new Left-wing party headed by Jeremy Corbyn and others has voted narrowly for it to have a ‘“collective leadership” in a win for Zarah Sultana, who has been at loggerheads with the former Labour leader.

The results were announced on Sunday after a chaotic start to its founding conference in Liverpool. Sultana, a former Labour MP who now sits as an independent, had boycotted the first day of the conference amid disagreements over how Your Party – its provisional name – should be run.

In advance of the results of voting on the party’s constitutional arrangements, Corbyn had said: “It’s quite hard for the public to grasp things that there are sort of 10 people who run things.”

However, members voted by 51.6% to 48.6% for the party – whose future name will be announced later on Sunday – to have a collective leadership model.

The auspices aren’t good, says the Guardian:

The party’s foundation has been overshadowed by internal conflict, resulting in a botched membership launch and threats of legal action. Two other Independent MPs, Adnan Hussain and Iqbal Mohamed, withdrew from the party’s founding process, in part due to infighting.

Those involved are also playing catch-up with the momentum behind the Green party under its new leader, Zack Polanski, amid a battle to take on the mantle of being the leading voice to the left of Labour.

Judith Woods in the Telegraph reminds us that:

Mohamed quit because of “the many false allegations and smears made against him and others”. These appear to have been in response to his perfectly mainstream gender critical views. “I also believe in the human rights of all trans and LGBTQ+ people but not by taking away the hard-won rights of women,” he stated.

At the time a spokesman for Sultana told this paper: “Zarah will always stand with the trans community. She believes an ironclad commitment to trans rights is non-negotiable for a socialist party.”

And given that the leadership vote was based on a 16% turnout, as New Statesman reported, the prospects for harmony don’t look good, to say nothing of its fixation with issues of absolutely no interest to most of the population. The magazine added that:

Sultana has been campaigning since before the conference began for the collective leadership model, and said in a statement: “From the very start I have been fighting for maximum member democracy. Seeing members choose collective leadership is truly exciting. Together, we’re building a new socialist party – radically democratic and powered by a mass movement. This party will be led by its members not MPs. This is only the beginning.”

The beginning of the end, perhaps?

One of the knotty issues is whether Your Party members can simultaneously belong to other parties. The democratic aspirations, it seems, do not extend that far:

Members also voted to allow dual membership of Your Party and other parties, which have been approved by the CEC [Central Executive Committee]. This amendment proved controversial following the expulsion of several members of the Socialist Workers Party on the eve of Your Party conference as under the current Your Party rules, members may not have dual membership of another party alongside their Your Party membership. Once the CEC has been elected and has ratified the list of allowed parties, dual membership will be allowed. Your Party sources did not comment on which parties will be permitted.

Some members are determined to place all-important factional interests in the forefront, reported New Statesman:

One group, the Democratic Socialists for Your Party, have called on their members to reject the constitution and political statement. In a message sent to members on WhatApp, the group said: “Despite victories won this weekend, we must be clear-eyed: the constitution is not a neutral procedural document, rather a political weapon”.

Some of the new party’s supporters remain resiliently optimistic, as Judith Woods (again) reported for the Telegraph:

“I prefer not to think of Zarah and Jeremy constantly at loggerheads,” says Neil Cathan, 35, an English teacher with green hair and a George Orwell T-shirt. “I would like to think that a party wanting to bring about unity and end the usual factionalism would be able to contain both personalities.

“Britain urgently needs an alternative to Labour which is now lurching to the Right. The Liberal Democrats are sounding OK right now, but they change position every five years; and the Greens are great but they are hampered by their name. It’s down to us.”

Don’t hold your breath. Meanwhile, the rest of us can sit back and watch the rest of the show as the ‘Titanic’ party creates its own icebergs to sink itself. 

The Telegraph’s piece is worth reading in full.

Stop Press: By Sunday afternoon, the epic news broke that the Your Party conference had finally confirmed the party’s name. It’s to be called – wait for it – Your Party. The future awaits.

Stop Press 2: Your Party will keep the name Your Party – but Jeremy Corbyn will be blocked from leading it, according to the Telegraph.